When The Hills aired in 2006, it became a cultural phenomenon. The glitzy reality drama followed Laguna Beach alumna Lauren Conrad to the mean streets of Los Angeles, where she battled douchey fuckboys, backstabbing besties, and Teen Vogue. When I watched The Hills at 14 years old, I thought it was aspirational: a story about a flaw-free heroine, Conrad, who had bad things done to her by bad people. Back then it seemed the well-meaning Conrad just couldn’t catch a break. From Jen Bunney’s girl-code violation to Audrina Patridge’s roommate woes to, of course, the Heidi Montag saga, Conrad was always feuding with her friends. And I felt for her. I really did! In particular, those three made some big mistakes with Conrad on the show.
But Lauren Conrad wasn’t completely innocent either. After rewatching The Hills at 27 years old—it’s my current survive-the-coronavirus-quarantine binge—I see some flaws in Conrad’s on-camera persona that obliterate the “perfect heroine” image I held in my pubescent mind.
I say “on-camera persona” because I’m only talking about Conrad’s depiction on The Hills, which I'm sure isn’t 100% indicative of her true personality. Yes, it was a reality TV show, but editing trickery can make even the most mundane stare look menacing. The Hills wasn’t a documentary-style show: It was a highly produced, improvised soap opera with a glossy finish. We saw the truth, but only part of it—which is why my opinions about Conrad are based on a character, not her character.
And that reality show character is a girl who had unreasonably high expectations for her friends. On the show, it seemed the only way to stay on Conrad's good side was to pledge allegiance solely to her. Any deviance from her wishes led to a sloshy nightclub spat, roommate freeze out, or—worse—a friendship-ending one-liner. (Think Conrad’s final decree to Montag in season three: “I want to forgive you. And I want to forget you.”)
But more on Montag later; that’s a beast I’m not quite ready to conquer. Let’s start simple, with Conrad’s squabble with Bunney over the World’s Greatest Man, Brody Jenner. In season two Conrad gave Bunney diamonds for her 21st birthday, and Bunney repaid her by hooking up with Jenner, the “first guy” Conrad was able to have feelings for post–Jason Wahler. Was this shady? Sure. Was it worth the knock-down, drag-out fight that ensued at Château LC? Not at all.
Because Conrad and Jenner never were exclusive. They went on a handful of dates that didn’t go anywhere due to lack of chemistry, a point Conrad reiterated to Us Weekly in 2016. Why would Conrad get so angry at Bunney for hooking up with a guy she had no feelings for? Perhaps it wasn’t the guy but was the fact that Bunney went behind Conrad’s back? But that theory goes out the window when Conrad tells Whitney Port that Bunney called and asked if she could hook up with Jenner before actually doing it. So what gives? Was there more to the story? Or did Conrad just get upset at her friend for no real reason at all other than to create drama for the show? With my rose-colored glasses off, unfortunately, I think the latter.
I see Conrad’s fight with Patridge in a totally different way too. At the end of the third season, Patridge, Conrad, and Lo Bosworth all moved into a house together. Childhood BFFs Conrad and Bosworth snagged rooms in the main house, while Patridge opted for her own space in the backyard guesthouse. The proximity immediately created a “two against one” vibe; Conrad would make limp attempts to include Patridge in her and Bosworth’s fun, but they were routinely drowned out by Bosworth’s flat-out rude behavior toward Patridge, which Conrad did nothing to curtail. Strike one.
Conrad always preached on the show that friends should own up to their shady behavior; however, when Patridge told Conrad that she felt ignored by her, LC immediately went on the defensive. She demanded Patridge list off specific instances where she felt ignored instead of just believing her friend’s feelings and apologizing—something she expects other people to do. Strike two.
And let’s talk about Conrad’s hatred of Patridge’s boyfriend, Justin Bobby. He was unpolished and had no qualms about burping in public, but he never did anything to hurt Conrad. That didn’t stop her and Bosworth from mocking him behind Patridge’s back. Strike three.
If Conrad’s treatment of Patridge gets three strikes, the situation with Montag has all nine innings. The crux of The Hills is, hands down, Conrad and Montag’s bitter feud. It’s a tale I can recite blindfolded and hanging upside down: Montag and Conrad were enjoying the single life in Los Angeles when hair gel aficionado Spencer Pratt came along and swept Montag off her feet. Conrad liked Pratt at first, but she soon began noticing behaviors that turned her off. So she made it very clear to Montag that she didn’t approve of Pratt, which drove a wedge between their friendship. Several aggressive moves from Pratt caused Conrad to blow up at Montag and essentially force her to choose between the best friend and the boyfriend. Montag chose Pratt, which ended her friendship with Conrad. The final nail in the coffin happened at the top of the third season, when Conrad suspected Montag and Pratt had started rumors that she made a sex tape with Wahler. A nasty nightclub fight ensued, where Conrad iconically said to Montag, “You know what you did!”
Indeed, what Montag did was horrible. If the rumors are true, Montag sat back and let her boyfriend—now husband—spread rumors about her once-best friend. Pratt’s petty moves from season two weren’t pretty, and Montag should’ve told her partner up front that he needed to play nice with her friends if he wanted their relationship to work.
But why was Conrad so involved in Montag’s relationship to begin with? Without a doubt, a major reason Montag and Conrad’s friendship disintegrated was Conrad’s overzealous attitude toward Pratt. She had every right to warn her friend about a douchey guy, but that doesn’t have to come with an ultimatum. A good friend could have lent a sympathetic ear throughout Montag’s relationship with Pratt, offering honest but encouraging advice when needed. Had this happened, maybe Speidi would’ve run their course. Maybe things would’ve turned out differently. There’s a way to be honest without drawing such a hard line in the sand. Were Conrad’s thoughts wrong? No. Was her alienating attitude? Yes, and this was just as responsible for Conrad and Montag’s feud as the other stuff. I never realized that until now.
Don’t hate me, LC stans. This isn’t an attack on Conrad. She is warm and talented, and she handled many of the situations on The Hills in an honest, authentic way that I applaud. But even the brightest heroines have their bad moments. They just need to own up to them. It makes them stronger. My biggest Hills grievance is that Conrad never did this. Maybe I would’ve kept my rose-colored glasses on if she had.
